Thursday, April 09, 2009

Iconoclast
My mother has always called me an iconoclast.
From Wikipedia...
People who engage in or support iconoclasm are called iconoclasts, a term that has come to be applied figuratively to any person who breaks or disdains established dogmata or conventions. Iconoclasm, Greek for "image-breaking," is the deliberate destruction (or defamation) of important symbolic images (or icons) recognized within a culture, religion, or society. An act of iconoclasm usually implies that the activity was public, rebellious, and originating from within the respective group.
The first time she called me an iconoclast was when I got Christmas cards with Elvis in a Santa hat. I don't even remember what the card said. I remember being rather proud of the label. Afterall at the time I was a teenager trying to be rebellious and it felt cool. Over time I have come to realize the label is true.
Not in a FU sort of way but more conventions never felt necessary or right to me. I felt it keenly recently at the wedding of a friend. While I am completely on board with getting or being married, all the trappings of the wedding seem silly to me. Now let me say that this is not to say I felt any disdain for her wedding, it was lovely. I just can't see myself doing those things. I am easily bored with convention and tradition
She held to all the old traditions. The white dress, the first dance, the cake (although she broke slightly with cheesecake, kudos:) and all those things you expect to see at a wedding. She and her now husband do all sorts of Norma Rockwell type activities...dance lessons, singing around the piano, big family dinners. My sister too we have to have Turkey on Thanksgiving, Ham on Easter chocolate on Valentine's day. Her Christmas tree is the same as the tree we had when I was growing up.
Sometimes I feel strange surrounded by these people. I could see myself never being married or being in an unconventional relationship (I'll keep those details to myself). I don't really like things and acquiring wealth has never been an interest of mine. I don't believe in God. My mother asks if things are appropriate to wear to church and I am dumbfounded...why does she care?
I guess what it boils down to is that there have to be people like this bride to keep old traditions and there have to be people like me or nothing would change.

1 comment:

Travis said...

I am feeling this very strongly right now as we plan our wedding. How do we celebrate our love and committment...and do it our own way?